Tuesday, April 11, 2017

role play


there is nothing but role play, at any given time, in any given direction, running in place, and getting there on time - an all together infinitude of thoughts and gestures, neuron migrations, memes on the move, muscular habits in concert, singing songs they think that they thought that they thought that they rehearsed, right now. the songs are singing about a singer. the memories are remembering someone who's remembering. thoughts are thinking about a thinker. actions are acting as though there is an actor, right now, as reading is reading about a reader. everything else is a dream. everyone else is news, anecdote, warning or fantasy. but you here and this here is so real, that it's not happening at all, so real that there's nowhere to rehearse for the rehearsal, the drums are already talking. the masks are already dancing, they rejoice - at play, at war, at love, at home, abroad, above and deep down below, in the earth, between your fingers - look through them, so very dead and alive, for the very first time...

"lamentation!" 

these are the very last tears you'll ever cry.



Friday, April 7, 2017

exquisitely awake


whatever I think about the world,
I'm thinking it
whatever I think about life,
I'm thinking it
whatever I think about death,
I'm thinking it
whatever I think about the future,
I'm thinking it
whatever I think about the past,
I'm thinking it
whatever I think about you,
I'm thinking it
whatever I think about my self,
I'm thinking it
whatever I think about thought,
I'm thinking it,
without beginning, without end,
beyond words, beyond thought,
call and response,
we are a relationship,
with relationship,
utterly responsible,
exquisitely awake

Sunday, April 2, 2017

there is a place



"there is a place, a location, that you come back to in your dreams, from time to time, and in the dream that place is familiar. When you awaken, if you take the care to inquire gently, you remember that it is even more than familiar. and when you remember to remember that you've been here before, it's so much stronger than deja vu - you know that place is real. You've been there before, again and again, in detail. And you're back, right now, as you read this. This is real. More real than dreams, more real than reality, because both "here" and "there", you know that place, you know without knowing how you know - a real memory of the reality beyond memory - located at the heart of memory itself, beyond which is like a wellspring - the place where we remember things is the same place where we see things is the same place that recognizes places and faces and traces of traces is the very place we call home again and again."

Sunday, March 19, 2017

true lies



"All teachings are prisons if believed in, but doorways if practiced" 

The so called modern perspective relates to models as though they are truths, 
while the traditional, organic, animist perspective relates to models, 
to spoken words, signs, objects, masks, dances and song 
as vectors of experience in the fathomless present
- a dialogue with the invisible.
Without pretending to understand, or to map, or otherwise theorize,
the focus could be on tone, emphasis, impact - function.
Here, Words are used to provoke -
call and response. 
So, if we become interested in how tone, rhythm, emotion, and context,
especially relational context affect the model, affect the word, affect the "mind",
we might ask, is it even important to model the "mind"?
is it important to model the "self"?
is it important to "decode the past"?
is it important to model the emergence and resolution of "trauma"?
is there even such a thing as a psyche?
is there even such a thing as an unconscious mind?
is there such a thing as a conscious mind?
can thought ever know what thought is?
Aren't all models of the mind, of trauma, of experience, of identity
lies
... more of less pertinent and penetrative
based on who speaks them, to whom, and how,
in what context, in service of what emotion,
to conjure what experience?

rather than asking,
"What Do I Believe?",
we might ask 
"How Do I Believe?"
If somehow we're always lying 
perhaps the only question 
we can truly ask right now is,
How Does This Feel? 
  


Saturday, February 25, 2017

a pure mirror

maybe the most profound insight
of the ancestral worldview
is that the world is a view -

that consciousness is endless and beginning-less
but awake to us and personal to us and creative through us  -

every word, gesture, memory and context,
powered by emotion -
a spectacle charged with meaning,
an operating system of colored links and icons,
textures to thoughts to feelings to meanings,
nothing pre-written and leaving no trace, self evident sensuality -
serpentine spiral of now chasing forever,
of here chasing there,
relationships in relationships,
a living metaphor,
a pure mirror,
maybe

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

the invisible





Every gesture we make appears as a context, a performance which suggests an audience, an audience which suggests a stage, a stage which suggests space beyond the stage, time beyond the stage, stretching out infinitely, in all directions, an infinite, inscrutable ocean of meanings and experiences that come into sharp focus at the crossroads of that single gesture. As we move, it moves.

The invisible, the infinite, the bottomless, ungraspable speaks when it speaks, as it speaks, about what it would speak through us. We are the midwives of an immaculate conception – the possible become sharp and dangerous right here and now, as our struggle as life against the great death. So our very doing is prayer, our very speech is prophecy, our dance is creation, our music is apocalypse, redemption, cliffhanger - axis. As we speak, it swings.

The Ancestors reach out to the Unborn through us, as our deeds and misdeeds stretching out in both directions, countless generations. So what are we doing, what are we saying, knowing, seeing, feeling in as much as there is truly no life after death, nor death before life for us, only for the Ancestors behind us, only for the Unborn before us, in as much as it is upon our memory that everything we love survives, it is only in our precious imagination that the children of our thought arise? Are we waiting to get it right? Are we waiting to be worthy? Are we hoping for perfection, while the house is on fire? How are we doing, saying, seeing, and sculpting the mask that we are, knowing that there is truly nothing else, nowhere else, but eternity? As we see, we are seen.

Monday, August 8, 2016

It's a conspiracy








It’s all a conspiracy, and it’s true, exquisitely true.
Designed to bring up all the things you’ve ever been
feared,  all the things you’ve hoped for, all the things
you regret, all the things you wonder, all these things
perfectly arranged to make you feel that all
these things are perfectly arranged in
such a way  that you will say,
“Of course this is real, Of course I’m real,
Of course. But, of course. I truly feel the way I feel.
Of course. It’s true. I'm true. I'm real. This is happening.”

So, everything and everyone is happening
in such a way as to suggest
that you are you and that you have a mind.
A total conspiracy .
Self hypnosis.
Where is this mind? Who made it? Who does it serve?
Is it an opportunity? Is it a trap?
Is it a mystery, inside a mystery?
Who is reading this?
Is reading reading this? What is reading?
What is happening?
Is this truly some kind of conspiracy?
Which kind?
If you knew which kind, who would you tell,
and how would you tell?
Truly, ask yourself, when no one
is around, and no one can hear
you, and no one can see you,
and no one really knows you,
and no one, not even you,
knows what you’re thinking,
or that you are even thinking, when
you are by yourself,
ask yourself,
“Can I keep a secret?”